Read this article if:
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You’re interested in dating
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You want to know about different types of people
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You to analyse your dating patterns
“I am what is mine. Personality is the original personal property.” Norman O. Brown
When you’re describing somebody to another person, it’s common for the phrase ‘you know the type’, to crop up in the conversation. In fact, there are only four main types of personality, according to matchmaking expert Taylor Glenn. Here she explains what they are, how to spot them, and how this knowledge, could improve your dating skills.
You may have heard about personality types in the media lately, and more and more businesses and organizations are looking at psychometric testing and personality typing as a way of understanding how we all function in the workplace. But what do these findings mean when it comes to dating?
Although we all have unique qualities, social scientists have studied personality patterns to find out how similar characteristics are often present in those who tend to fall into certain “types.” These various characteristics affect how we behave and respond emotionally and cognitively to situations, including dating and relationships.
Here are some examples of common personality types and some possible dating patterns often associated with each:
Aggressive: Aggressive personality types like to take command of situations, whether in work or in their personal life. On the positive: Goal directed and adventurous, these types are often ambitious, successful, and highly sociable. On the negative: Aggressive types tend to work best in a hierarchy, such as a corporate environment, where power and structure are the norm. However, this can lend itself to rigidity and a lack of flexibility in certain situations which can lead to quick frustration and temper. On the dating scene: Aggressive types are more apt to initiate a conversation and take charge of the courtship ritual, which can be refreshing for those who are more on the shy side. It’s important for aggressive types to watch their communication skills, however; they can come on too strong if not careful.
Sensitive: Sensitive personality types tend to be reserved, modest people, who have a keen awareness of others’ feelings. On the positive: Creative, loving, and modest, Sensitive types are conscientious and tend to be loyal and trustworthy and can be quite artistically inclined and good writers. On the negative: Their tendency to withdraw can sometimes lead to avoidance of social events and missed opportunities in work and personal life. On the dating scene: Sensitive types tend to have good listening skills on a date, are attentive and caring, and tend to develop close relationships. However, their calm, reserved demeanour can sometimes be misinterpreted as cold, which can make first dates or initiation difficult.
Dramatic: Dramatic personalities are emotional and extroverted, usually enjoying attention and socialising. On the positive: Expressive, lively, dramatic types often excel in entertainment and media and are often the life of the party. On the negative: Emotional ups and downs can cause problems in various areas of life. On the dating scene: Dramatic types sometimes neglect others when they’re too focused on turning the spotlight on themselves, which can lead to frustration for their partners. However, Dramatic types tend to be fun, engaging dates who excel at conversation.
Leisurely: Laid-back and carefree, leisurely types are easy going and agreeable, equally happy with or without company. On the positive: Calm, deliberate, and flexible, Leisurely types thrive in flexible environments without strict rules or assigned roles. On the negative: If they reject social norms too much, Leisurely types can find themselves isolated from others. On the dating scene: Not abiding by traditional dating rules, Leisurely types can sometimes drop the ball when it comes to taking dating to the next steps; forgetting to call or failing to express interest even if they feel positively about a date. On the flip side, their calm and relaxed personality can be a plus to put others at ease and open up conversation.
No one falls into any one personality category exactly, and there are certainly more “types” than discussed here. However, by understanding personality typing you can help shed some light on your dating patterns, and in turn help you make sense of others.
Taylor Glenn
TAYLOR GLENN, M.S., LCSW, Matchmaking Specialist
Taylor Glenn is a licensed psychotherapist and matchmaking specialist for Seventy-Thirty Ltd, a company which provides professional matchmaking, networking, and life coaching services to high-net worth clientele and matches them with those who aspire to meet successful, compatible partners.
